Blue River Fly Classic

Blue River Fly Classic
A One Pattern Fly Event

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Chapter 58 Day 43 - Trout Season

Oh, Those Old Cold Bones

In the moment the great creator decided to give my mother the only child she would ever have, there evidently was a shortage of construction materials.  This shortage I speak of surely explains why little material was used in the creation of yours truly. 

I'm skinny - there's no other way to say it. 

I don't know if I mind being skinny.  If I really try, I can see some advantages of being thin, skinny, skinrod built, sparse or whatever adjective one might come forth with. 

In being skinny, never have I had to worry about the scales, or going on a diet... watching the waist-line, or going to the gym and sweating my arse off several days a week in order to keep the current wardrobe owned. 

You won't catch me in a grocery store turning containers around looking at the calorie content of anything.  If it looks good... it if sounds good... if it smells good... I'm gonna eat it!  In being skinny, there has never been those moments when I'd pass on a slice of Key lime or coconut creme pie, or tell the ice cream scooper to hold back on the chocolate syrup - no, no, no,... drown it please. 

However, there are some disadvantages in being thin also. 

They make some kind of device that measures body fat.  I figure if they put that device on me the response would be, "Mister.... your nothing but bone, blood, and sinew!"  And, this is where being skinny becomes a great disadvantage. 

Skinny people get cold faster when fly fishing during the winter.  It's not hard to figure out why - there is no fat on our bodies to protect us from the darn cold weather. 

Look at creatures in nature.  Creatures like sea lions, polar bears, and some whales, that live in cold environments have deep layers of fat on their bodies.  This fat insulates them from the cold temperatures.  Have you ever seen a skinny sea lion? 

One disadvantage is clothes.  You ever try to find a pair of 28 X 32 pair of jeans?  Oh, there are plenty of 30 X 32 pair of jeans available, but 28 waist size?  Only on very lucky days do I strike gold in my clothing shopping. 

Clothing problems I can live with, but the larger problem for me in being skinny is freezing my bo-hind off fly fishing during the winter.

During winter, I tend to layer clothng each time I go fly fishing, whether it be at Blue River or anywhere else.  However, there are only so many layers a fellow can put on before he gets to feeling "stoved up". 

After three or four long sleeved pull-over shirts, a guy can beomce cinched, or stiff, bound-up, and the elbows become locked up.  The elbows, I dare to say, in fly fishing are somewhat important.  Plus, with all those layers of clothing on, if you go into the soup they are gong to absorb a lot of water rather quickly.

Then, consider this.  If you have three or four long sleeved pull-over's on, either you'll wear them outside the pants or inside and either way the waders are going over.  As sure as the sun rises in the east, the urge to de-water the bladder will come about and it's tough trying to wade through four layer of shirts in opening the barn door.  For some of us, when we wait too long, trying to get through all those layers to opening said barn door can result in... disaster.  Enough said, huh? 

So... I've been shopping here of late looking for some of the new-age technology in cold weather clothing that will keep my little butt warm. 

Today, I looked at Under Armour products and so far I like what I read.  Price point is usually a deciding factor, but, sometimes the comfort factor will far outweigh the price of any product.  And, such is the case in my case. 

I looked at a couple of other cold season undergarment products, but, they mentioned wool.  Wool is warm no doubt, however, some of us who are of northern european descent tend to have problems wearing wool.  People of northern europen descent have a high tendency to understand what eczema is and eczema and wool is kind of like fire and petro.  For a person with eczema wearing wool is like asking for an invitation to the doctor's office and a big and painful steroid shot in the buttock.  Been there, done that, it sucks.

I'm going to keep shopping and find some cold weather fly fishing gear because I'm tired of freezing my little arse off.  I know there's not much to "freeze off", but the little I do have... I'd really like to keep.



I broke down and spent the $$ for the UA a couple of years ago. It is worth the $$, glad I did it. Now if someone would invent some battery operatd gloves for fly fishermen!

Barry said...

I hear you about the gloves. Funny things about gloves...they seem to make everything fly fishing more difficult. Thanks for the tip on UA, going to get me some.