Blue River Fly Classic

Blue River Fly Classic
A One Pattern Fly Event

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Chapter 58 Day 51 - Trout Season

This Year's Letter To Santa

Here it is only four days to Christmas and I finally got my letter off to Santa today, telling the big man exactly what I want this year. 

It's been many, many years since I've wanted something material for Christmas - throw a bottle of Old Spice and a year's subscription to a fly fishing magazine at me and I'm good. 

Still, there are things I wish for.  So, with that being said, here are the five things I've asked Santa for this Christmas season.

Dear Santa,

This year here are the things I hope you will bring and put under the Christmas tree while I'm sleeping off the volumes of egg-nog consumed in the spirit of the season. 

1.  More rain and less drought.  C'mon Santa, I know you follow the blog and know what happen to Charlie and me last spring and summer while trying to pursue the carp.  So... tie a big red ribbon around a whole bunch of rain clouds and send them over the prairie ocean this year. 

2.  Cleaner streams and less trash in our wild areas.  Santa, maybe you can dispatch one of those invisible elves you keep in check down to Blue River and arm him with a taser gun.  Everytime that elve sees someone throw trash on the river, he can zap them in the ass with 100,000 volts!  That ought to stop em' from sucking eggs.

3.  More fish and more fly anglers.  This one just makes sense Santa.  The more fish you can gift us, then the more fly anglers there will be, and as you know, being one yourself, fly anglers are pretty darn good stewards of our wild areas.  So... wrap up a couple of battleship-size portions of fish and send them down this way.

4.  Less time at work and more time on the water.  Let's face it Santa... work sucks.  I guess you wouldn't know much about that, only having to work one friggin' day of the year, but, I'm telling you... any bad day fly fishing beats a good day at work, which is an oxymoron to begin with!

5.  Less tailing loops and wind knots.  I know we've been over this before and don't you dare,  Ho, ho, ho me over this issue anymore.  Sure, I know you've told me the tailing loops comes from not drifting on the stop of the backstroke, and therefore the wind knots come from overpowering on the foward stroke, and yada, yada, yada.  Just fix it Santa and I'll be happy.

Oh, by the way, you throw a pretty ugly open loop you know.

Well Santa, gotta go and I hope you'll grant all my Christmas wishes this year.  If you find the time to stop playing with the elves, then let's get a day on the water together. 

See ya Santa.


Herman said...

By far the best Christmas list I have read this year. Well, my son's was ripe with spelling errors and was pretty darn funny.... but this one is a keeper. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

Barry said...

Merry Christmas to you sir!